The Definition of Undateable

(The link from Clad Men disappeared from the site, but was still in my google reader feed, so I just copy-pasted here)

Style advice, like any advice, varies depending on the individual. Here’s a breakdown of items to seek out (and avoid) depending on the shape and build of your frame. And no, it isn’t debatable.

Big & Tall

You Want: Pants with cuffs to break up your seemingly endless inseam; pants with slimming, shallow pleats; a dark navy suit.

Avoid: Anything with horizontal lines, which accentuate your girth; anything with vertical lines, which make you look taller.

Long & Lean

You Want: Anything with horizontal lines to help you look broader; three-button jackets that match the scale of your torso.

Avoid: Anything with vertical lines, which only make you look taller; tight suits and jackets that advertise your thin limbs.

Short & Stocky

You Want: Single-button suits that have a deep V at the chest to make the torso look longer; V-neck sweaters that do the same.

Avoid: Anything with Horizontal stripes or busy plaids, which break up the body’s vertical lines; wide pants and cuffs.

Short & Lean

You Want: Two-button suit jackets that work in proportion to your torso; thicker fabrics (like corduroy), which offer the illusion of heft.

Avoid: Anything baggy or loose, which draws attention to your size; anything that’s all black.

(Illustrations by Michael Hoeweler)

This man knows what he’s talking about, guys. READ.

Exhibit A:

Exhibit B:

“I can’t stand people looking dishevelled — especially after age 35!” - Karl Lagerfeld

“For a few years now older men, businessmen have started going without a tie to look younger,” says Jean-Jacques Picart. “So it’s only normal for young people to reclaim them”

Exhibit A: